You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize