And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
