I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize