Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
