More tranny stories later!
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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