It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
