Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
