So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
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dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
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It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize