I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
