whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
