My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize