you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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