Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder