did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Randomize
