You just made me feel so damn special
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
The adults are the big ones right?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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