Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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