You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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