Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
