I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
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You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
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She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
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