Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize