Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Randomize
