i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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