I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
