I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
