Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
The air was thick with penises
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
