I CAN MOONWALK!
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Actions speak louder than pants.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
