Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
