Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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