I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
handjob tips. give me some.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
