I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
