Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize