real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
wanna go halves on a baby?
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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