that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize