He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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