Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?