I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
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She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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