Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
