Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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