420 ftw
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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