Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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