Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
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