Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize