My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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