He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Randomize
