the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
