Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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