I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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