You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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