And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
