My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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