I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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